I bet the guy who invented the snooze button never invented anything else.
I recently took a pole and found that 100% of the people were angry when the tent collapsed.
I like dogs cuz if you do something stupid they don’t criticize you, they do it with you.
Many people are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.
Boating season is upon us.
Add a touch of magic to your allergies by filling your mouth with glitter before you sneeze.
How many times do you have to click “I accept cookies” before they send you the cookies?
Genie: I grant you three wishes.
Bob: I want to be rich.
Rich: I want a lot of money.
My neighbor’s dogs are named Calvin and Klein. They’re boxers.
British websites use biscuits.