Only in New York will they pay $5 a bottle for cold water, but cry when it’s free from the sky.
Don’t say “lets get weird” on our date then get freaked out I’m dressed in Forever 21 and holding your cousin hostage.
I “pet zone” girls. It’s like the friend zone, but, I only hang out if your dog will be there.
Man buns: Because girls want the convenience of a guy who always has a hair tie.
This year for Lent, I’m just giving up.
I can’t wait until Taylor Swift breaks up with a black guy so she can put out a rap album.