I just read a list of “100 Things To Do Before You Die”…
I couldn’t believe “Yell for help” wasn’t one of them.
I just typed “cupkale” instead of “cupcake” and accidentally invented what has to be the worst dessert idea in the history of mankind.
Sure you may FEEL old, but did YOUR parents need a TV commercial to remind them you existed?
Whoever decided to make Peeps flavored Pepsi and NOT call it Peepsi committed the biggest fumble in the history of sugar
‘Too much’, ‘not enough’. or ‘just right’? 😂
Aziz Ansari dancing in the video for “Otis” is me at every wedding I’ve ever been to.
“Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.”
Ovenable?
My loaf of bread looks terrified
R.I.P. Wile E. Coyote
I guess my package was delivered by Disney animals
I just found my new favorite conspiracy theory …
Remember when our biggest fear in 2019 was lettuce?
“I FIXED IT!”
I hate it when I think that there’s an open parking space and then I have to run over a motorcycle …