don’t be sad laundry, nobody’s doing me either
sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested
water solves a lot of problems.
want to lose weight? drink more water
having a bad day? take a shower
tired of someone’s bullshit? drown them
Pi Day is just a fake holiday created by math companies to sell more math.
dating after 40 is like riding a bike uphill through a blazing inferno with flat tires.
when someone tells me love is in the air 😷
I love October because we finally turn the AC off, then turn the heat on at 5am, then turn the heat off by 7am, then open up the windows at 9am, then close the windows at 12pm, then turn the AC back on by 1pm, then turn the AC off again at 7pm, then turn the…