@DadInUtah

Me: What are you doing in your pajamas still? 3 year old: Eating frosting. Me: Fair enough.

@DadInUtah

Asking your stay-at-home wife what exactly she did all day is a fun way to bleed.

@DadInUtah

Wife: We’re supposed to get 8-10 inches tonight. Me: That’s what she said. Wife: Can’t you do any better than that? Me: That’s what she said

@DadInUtah

6 year old: Daddy, what if the plane goes down? Me: Don’t worry, your mom is with us. She never goes down. 6 year old: What? Me: Want candy?