The lion king: 🎶it’s the circle of life!
The lyin king: so yeah he just fell off that cliff
[garden of Eden]
Adam: you’d be so pretty if you smiled
Eve: think I’m gonna go talk to that snake
‘why do people post shit online that never happened just for likes and attention’ my cat asked me
Papa john’s: order a pizza!
Mama john’s: we have pizza at home
Captain hook: hi do you have any quite big gloves? maybe a bit piratey, nothing weird
sales assistant: oh not you again
oh no, pressed the wrong button on the remote and accidentally summoned a demon again
my lower back watching me try to live my life
[dinner party at spooky castle]
host: so NONE of you will leave here tonight..
guests: *gasp*
host: ..without a HUG!
[killer in horror movie suddenly appears]
me: *sighing* ugh I JUST sat down
Danny in Grease: I want this car to look cool
Kenickie: sure bro
Danny: and put in a part that makes it fly
Kenickie: wait what
me: you don’t listen to a thing I say, I’m leaving you
bf: haha I know right
imagine being the mom in Gremlins you just wanted to have a nice family christmas and your husband brings home a new pet then it starts multiplying and evolving into little demon lizard things and you have to put one in your new blender and you’re like why is this my life now
Batman: so I’ve been tracking the Joker’s movements all night and we need to-
Robin: you LIKE him!
Batman: omg shut up lol I do not
Jesus: one of you will betray me
Judas: *surprised pikachu face*
imagine being Pierce brosnan in Mrs doubtfire, you’re dating a nice woman, her kids like you, it’s all great then one day you’re in a restaurant choking from anaphylactic shock and her drunk ex husband runs towards you in an old lady costume and you think how is this my life now