Leaving the beach yesterday I said to myself ‘don’t leave your phone on the roof of the car, woman’.
Long story short, someone found my phone on the side of the road and just returned it to me
My son made us all hide then jump out and yell ‘surprise!’ for his birthday. If you guys aren’t planning the same for my birthday on Tuesday, it’s gonna sting
No thanks, ancestry dot com. I don’t like the family I’m aware of; I really don’t need to know about anyone else
Now that I’m 40, I’ve had to change my safe word to ‘my knees! my knees!’