If you think it hurts to lose a boyfriend/girlfriend, you’ve clearly never lost close to 500 GB’s worth of data on your hard drive.
Dad- I want you to have everything in this world that your heart desires.
*Can I have oreos?*
Adulthood is like looking both sides before crossing the street and them getting hit by an airplane.
Parents: Your room is a mess.
Me: You really need to see my life.
Cop: Lemme see your papers
Cop: These are rolling papers
Me: Would you look at that
Cop: Sir are you high?
Me: What are you, a cop?
Hahaha this stupid baby on the bus thinks they can cry louder than me