Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of Itskarleytime's best tweets

@Itskarleytime : Statistically humans have sex 104 times a year. This is about to be a very wild 12 days.

@Itskarleytime: Is corn the only vegetable that’s better exploded?

@Itskarleytime: It’s almost 2018 and laser eye surgery still doesn’t mean what I want it to

@Itskarleytime: Guy at a bar: wanna come back to my place?

Me: *elaborate excuse*

Guy: did you just say elaborate excuse?