The calories of the third sandwich don’t count of the first two were delicious
All tattoos have meaning. In Brazil, they mostly mean you have disposable income
Too many catfish out there. Verify your identity by posting yourself holding a spoon. I’ll go first
I am on a diet. This is just my cheat decade
Can’t. Have to go tighten all the jar lids so I feel useful tomorrow when my chef sister comes cook
I can’t be the only person who daydreams about licking people
Yesterday, I build a closet. Today, I’m making jam. Tomorrow, I’m ending inequality. Jk, I’m reenacting Connan the barbarian with sock puppets
You have your whole life ahead of you. They threatened
Do we still do thirst traps threads? I’m having a really good bellybutton day and it’s totally going to waste
That plant looks good. Let’s eat the bit that stays in the dirt
– first person to cook a potato
Apocalypse life hack: mute the news and play White Stripes “seven nation army”. It’s still horrible but it feels so much cooler
In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real
A lady once dmed and asked if we had internet in Brazil. I think about it a lot
Children are the future. Cuz in the present, they’re hella annoying
If you aren’t amazed by a plant showing up after you put a seed in the ground, we have nothing to talk about. Unless you’re like, really hot.