@Jandalize: Picture me naked.
Wrong.
More plates of nachos stacked around me.

@Jandalize: Every time I steal lunch from the office fridge I can't help but think, I wish my coworkers would pack larger lunches.

@Jandalize: I do my best yoga when I'm trying to reach an M&M that rolled under my desk.

@Jandalize: Hoping all my fellow North Carolinians are staying safe. Except my 7th grade boyfriend. I hope that dude ends up in China.

@Jandalize: Sorry your team lost. Maybe you should've told the players what to do more loudly from your recliner.

@Jandalize: What if Capri Suns became self-aware and started stabbing us back?

@Jandalize: Good morning to everyone except people that sit right beside me when there are lots of other seats open.

@Jandalize: Bad news: I think I may have broken my toe. Good news: the smart car I tripped over will be alright.

@Jandalize: Ever accidentally turn off your alarm instead of hitting the snooze button and wake up two days later?