One of my students looked at me this morning and said I must have had a rough morning so if your feelings are easily hurt teaching might not be for you
My cat has taught me that an 80:20 ratio of sleep to physical activity is really the way to go
The way I’m terrified to one day raise a teenager you’d think they have rabies
My daughter asked me if I’d be very upset if she didn’t live with me when she’s a grownup so I told her I’d try my best once I stopped laughing
I don’t buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parent’s house like an adult
The struggle when hungry me has to eat the lunch that healthy me packed
Play monopoly on the first date so you know what you’re getting into
When kids try to guess your age it will either be completely flattering or utterly devastating, but never correct.
My daughter now associates height with age and refuses to believe I could be older than someone that’s 5’5”
Real jealous of all the bears getting fat and preparing to sleep for months
You can be 30+ years old with children of your own and your parents will tell you not to eat too much ice cream because you threw up once when you were 8
Netflix needs an “unwatch” button so you can watch the newest episode without getting caught
My daughter wrote a story at school about a sad cat that drinks cocktails so I should probably call her teacher
Hear me out: a dating service that matches you based on your food delivery orders like “this person also ordered Chinese food five nights in a row”
When they tell you the salad is your whole dinner and not just a side
