I’m gonna be honest. Even after the vaccine I’m only gonna wanna hang out with 3 of you.
The only thing I want from a 25 year old man is his metabolism.
What’s your weapon of choice in the zombie apocalypse? Mine is a slower person.
I’m going to replace my uterus with something practical, like a second stomach or a bubble gum machine.
I’ve been using the Netflix account of an ex for half a decade. We broke up in 2010 & in 2017 I got a text out of nowhere that said, “Do you watch anything that isn’t about death??” No. No I do not.
My gynecologist sent me a refund check for $18.70. I don’t know what it’s for but I feel like I need to be offended.