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Page of MacAnnabella's best tweets

@MacAnnabella : Every time I delete a selfie, I imagine the sound of a Gremlin being burned alive by the sunlight.

@MacAnnabella: Canadians are not always nice, especially if your son pisses on their snowman.

@MacAnnabella: My friend's offering to pay for a trip to NY to be her +1 for a wedding.

She's probably going to drug me & sell my organs. *agrees to go :)

@MacAnnabella: Passive aggressive has never been my thing, I prefer chasing you with a chainsaw.

@MacAnnabella: "That wasn't chicken in the Chow Mein"

I'd make a great Fortune Cookie writer.

@MacAnnabella: I don't want to hear about any moonlit romantic walks on the beach...unless there's a clown with a wooden club chasing you.

@MacAnnabella: "You're prettier than I remember, you were SO FAT the last time I saw you!"

TY Uncle Bob, I was 8months pregnant. *spits in his pumpkin pie

@MacAnnabella: Me: "Gee Thanks for spilling Cheerios all over the floor."

3yo: "You're welcome Mom, look at this!"*scatters more on floor

I deserve that.

@MacAnnabella: People that proudly carry their yoga mats around town...

I get it. I carry my Burrito around with that same pride.

@MacAnnabella: The next time someone describes me as feisty, I'm going to stand in front of them and air punch rapidly like Scrappy Doo.