@MariasWestSide

I love my Alexa, but I need someone that’s really going to tell it to me straight, maybe like a Renee “hey boo, this fool calling again with some lame shit but you haven’t been laid in a month so you can’t be picky”…

@MariasWestSide

Good men aren’t hard to find.. if anything they’re just hard to stuff in your trunk

-true story

@MariasWestSide

I usually spend so much time looking for the perfect excuse to cancel plans.. now we all have the same one