Hot Pockets- Now with 5 cheese!
Me- *adding both nacho and spray cheese* Amateurs
Getting married is easy, staying married when all of your drunken midnight Amazon purchases show up on your husband’s day off is not.
I texted my husband about all the sex I’m expecting for my birthday and accidentally sent it to my MIL. She just responded that she’s already made other plans that day.
My daughter just told me I’m giving her gray hairs and ran for her stress ball so I think I’m finally nailing this whole parenting thing.
*Pouring nacho cheese over my bowl of cornflakes* No, I wouldn’t say I’ve let quarantine life change me.
My son had to pick his towel up off the floor today. Apparently he’s forced to do everything around here.
Every morning I ask how my daughter is doing and she in turn asks me how Beyoncé is doing. I said why can’t you ask how I’m doing too and she says she will when I sound more like Beyoncé.
My husband just started assembling a bookshelf so I guess we’re fighting now.
Parenting is easy, until those kids wake up.
I made my preteen wear long pants in freezing weather this morning and subsequently ruined his “street cred”