Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets
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@MaryJustice86 : Weird how my husband is so adamant about not having more animals for someone who’s going to own more animals.
@MaryJustice86: Weird how my husband can sleep through the baby crying but he jumps straight up with one unsnap of my bra hook.
@MaryJustice86: It’s not rude to hand visitors a timer when they show up, right??
@MaryJustice86: I spent my time preparing a home cooked dinner and placed it in front of the kids who asked for something different, and laughed. Then I laughed. Then we laughed. Then I spoke in a voice not of this world & everyone ate their damn dinner.
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