My cat that died 3 years ago got a letter saying she needs to register if she wants to vote, showing how well Florida handles elections.
*watches How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days*
pfft… I could do it in 8
“Always wear a pretty bra. The worst case is nobody sees it.”
~ Not an old Irish proverb
The rose petal scene from American Beauty, but just me naked and covered in candy wrappers.
Wearing a pretty new bra today that nobody else is gonna see, so everytime I go to the bathroom, I flash myself in the mirror.
Coworker to me: ” Why are you always rushing out of here after work? You’re single with no kids.”
Me: ” Exactly.”