@Peauxtassium

You may recognize me from many TikTok videos playing the role of Mom Who Talks Because She Doesn’t Know Camera Is On

@Peauxtassium

Has anyone ever pissed you off so much that you just want to strangle them but then you realize you were overreacting so you calm down after 2 or 3 decades

@Peauxtassium

Welcome to your 40s. Time moves much faster now. Welcome to your 50s

@Peauxtassium

This selfie angle isn’t to make me look thin, it’s so you can check me for lice

@Peauxtassium

Ask yourself, “do I like finding socks in every room of the house?” and if the answer is yes, unprotected sex is right for you.

@Peauxtassium

My husband lost 10 lbs without trying. I’m waiting for him to apologize.

@Peauxtassium

You’re never too old to set goals. For example, today I’m not going to pee in my pants.

@Peauxtassium

Don’t count the days. Make the days count. Make the months do subtraction. Make the weeks recite the alphabet

@Peauxtassium

If you love her, shout it from the rooftops. Tell everyone around you. Tell the internet. Tell the cashier at cvs. Tell a hobo. Tell her husband. Whatever.