Funny Tweeter

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Page of ShawnIzadi's best tweets

@ShawnIzadi : Meiosis is still a better love story than Twilight.

@ShawnIzadi: That moment you could pass as an Olympic speed walker because you are racing to the bathroom.

@ShawnIzadi: Walked into the bathroom and it sounded like someone was powerlifting in one of the stalls. That, or an exorcism.

@ShawnIzadi: Password security questions be like: What's your middle name? Why are you single? What's wrong with your big toe?

@ShawnIzadi: I think the problem is that I'm 20% stud and 80% muffin.

@ShawnIzadi: Just overheard a guy say he was buying a MacBook so he doesn't have to worry about the Ebola virus. What.

@ShawnIzadi: Why use words you don't understand in your tweets? It just makes you look photosynthesis.