When I said I liked you..I never meant every day.
I love when people tell me to get my act together and I’m like who the hell is acting geez.
Charm me with your intelligence or just wait till I’m really drunk.
I really was gonna jog at the park today….but I just found an empty park bench so I’ll just have a few smokes and cheer the joggers on.
Yes I am that gift that keeps on giving most people the finger.
Getting caught under your desk and coming up with nothing in your hand is always so hard to explain.
I am not that kind of woman…I”m much worse.
My favourite drivers are the designated ones.
Find someone to make you laugh everyday and if that doesn’t work find alcohol like I did.
Pretty sure I just did some classical ballet move as I got off the computer chair to get to the kitchen and saw a spider on my floor.