Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets
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@The_Sculptress : I talk a lot of shit for someone who still uses their fingers to count.
@The_Sculptress: Always be yourself, unless you can be a giraffe. Then, be a giraffe.
@The_Sculptress: Every night when you sleep,I sneak into your house, full of desire.
I then reduce the amount of marshmallowy treats in your cereal&go home.
@The_Sculptress: I love you guys with all my ass. I would say heart, but my ass is bigger.
@The_Sculptress: The only double penetrating I'll ever do is eating the double stuff Oreo I just dropped into my coffee.
@The_Sculptress: Remember that time when you didn't call, & a giraffe round house kicked your neck, & you fell off a merry-go-round & died?nnSo sad. Really.
@The_Sculptress: If I see someone stumble, catch themselves, & madly start looking about to see if anyone saw, I always make sure I make direct eye contact.