Funny Tweeter

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Page of ThisLocalHater's best tweets

@ThisLocalHater : [from under your bed] Babe, are you mad at me?

@ThisLocalHater: Pretty rude of this cop to pull me over while I'm trying to change my pinned tweet

@ThisLocalHater: [contacting you by Ouija board after murdering you]

AND ANOTHER THING

@ThisLocalHater: Don't even talk to me until I've had my coffee and watched at least 45 minutes of archived Ted Bundy trial footage.

@ThisLocalHater: Let me slip into something more comfortable.

*climbs into a wood chipper*

@ThisLocalHater: [pouring another round of shots for my dolls]

What do you mean isolated and unstable?

@ThisLocalHater: If you hate the word moist, try replacing it with muggy.

For example: Her panties were muggy af.

@ThisLocalHater: I wonder if there's a giant cucumber out there thinking about me too.

@ThisLocalHater: Him: Hey girl, what that mouth do?

Me: Mostly complain. Sometimes binge eat. I also get these weird sores that - wait, where are you going?