looks like stacy’s mom has got some competition
I’ll never understand why people buy dogs from breeders when growing your own is free and far more rewarding.
My wife handed me a clean towel and told me to “put it in its place.” So, I looked at it and said, “Don’t forget that you’re only a towel,” and I was reminded yet again of just how lucky this woman was to be married to me.
It was Timothy’s second week undercover, and frankly, he was getting absolutely nowhere.
The Birdles
“We’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty.”
Thursday, 4:01pm
“Still there.”
“Yep.”
“Looks blue.”
“It certainly does.”
“Wet too.”
“Totally.”
“See you next week?”
“Count on it.”
“I now pronounce you lunch and dinner.”
Teach your teenager a valuable life lesson; show them how to grow their own car, just like their ancestors did.
this is what happens when everyone feeds the same stray
car not found
“First you bug me to go out, and now you want to come right back in? You’ve been out there for like thirty seconds. Did you at least pee? Tell me you at least peed.”
I open the door slowly, slipping inside. I keep a measured pace, breathing evenly, keeping my heartbeat low. Five steps, ten steps; I begin to relax. A voice calls from behind me, ”Sir?” I ignore it. “Sir, what’s that in your pants?” I walk faster. “Someone stop that man!” I run.
“Regardless of what Newton said, gravity is just a theory that you humans choose to accept as fact. If you simply refuse to take it as a given, then the whole paradigm shifts. Anyway Brenda, when you’ve got a minute, the litter in my box could really use a change.”
Studio Apartment Available:
– Pet-friendly
– Located next to bridge
– No strings attached