@WilliamAder

If I ever become a super hero, my origin story will involve a sourdough starter mishap.

@WilliamAder

If I were 30 years younger, I’d remember where I was going with this tweet.

@WilliamAder

Made the mistake of telling my work wife about my Twitter crush. Long story short, the judge awarded her half the snacks in my desk and my good stapler.

@WilliamAder

When the hot singles found out I was in their area they moved.

@WilliamAder

Remember when folks kept pictures of people in their wallets? Like they might forget what their loved ones look like?

@WilliamAder

Wore my clip-on, flip-up sunglasses in my dating profile pic, because women don’t easily forget something like that.