@YUCKYBOT

“Are you a cop? You have to tell me if you’re a cop.”

“I’m a cop.”

“So you’re a cop AND a gun dealer? Random, but okay let’s do this shit”

@YUCKYBOT

You know what they say? Once you go white, you’ll rob the world of it’s resources and murder indigenous peoples.

@YUCKYBOT

“By night’s end, one of these teams will be the victor.” Thank you for that breakdown, Bob Costas. I was worried they might all die instead.

@YUCKYBOT

The difference between my “Maine lobster” and my “main lobster” is boiling water or a high five.

@YUCKYBOT

I wouldn’t want lesbian parents. Not because I’m homophobic. I just don’t want to get stuck in an endless loop of “Go ask your mother.”

@YUCKYBOT

Can you guys give me the names of some famous athletes and prisoners? I’m making a pros and cons list.

@YUCKYBOT

Divorces should just be reverse weddings where you get pushed out of a church while your friends steal appliances from your home.

@YUCKYBOT

Hey parents with teenagers, the bottle of vodka in your liquor cabinet is water.