My latest missile blew up on the launch pad.
But it exploded so fast Americav couldn’t tell what type it was.
I’m not telling.
Checkmate.
Someone in South Korea accused North Korea of having assassination squads.
That’s a lie.
On an unrelated note, I need that guy’s address.
How does North Korea only have four medals so far?
We’re the best at everything.
We even fed our athletes this time.
The rest of the world should fear our military.
We have the most cutting edge technology 1954 had to offer.
I’m not a god.
I’m a regular guy who just happens to be immortal and perfect in every way.
There’s a difference.
My clothes don’t fit anymore.
There’s only one possibly explanation.
America is shrinking my clothes.
I hired a PR team.
They said the public would like me more if I stopped executing people.
I executed the PR team.
For the last time, I don’t have any secret prison camps.
Anyone who doesn’t believe me will be sent to a secret prison camp.