Finally got my treadmill setup. I can start making excuses why I’m not using it starting tomorrow.
Them: Holy shit. How high are you?
Me: *6 minutes later* No, you are.
Dear Mr. Horsefly:
Today you angrily, and aggressively, began to attack me without mercy or remorse as I tried to enjoy a refreshing beverage outside.
Just know, the reason I quickly ran into my home was not because of you, but because I had to turn off the oven.
Not too proud of the sounds I just made when a mouse popped out of a bag I grabbed in the garage.
At least something in this house will finally get stuffed tomorrow.
I picked one hell of a year to stop drinking.