why does this building look like a guilty dog
bet the third joker movie will just be called “jok3r”
i’ve got a body like a sack of potatoes but a personality like a french fry
gas pump: see attendant
me: looks like i no longer need gas
i want the met gala theme to be “work from home” and celebrities just wear designer sweatpants and shirts with holes in them
told someone “my scrubs are made from cotton but i’m made of boyfriend material” then they blocked me immediately
my beach body is like my amazon package: delayed indefinitely
ugh not again
every college guy’s fridge
Batman trying to get some sleep during the day
My dog learned how to text
WebMD on April Fools: You’re fine
just got robbed by a bunch of girl scouts, well i wasn’t robbed but they did take all my money
going to the doctor for the first time since becoming a doctor, can’t wait to say “ah yes i concur with your diagnosis”
hackers play passwordle