@brennadine

Therapist: You have an addictive personality
Me: I think you’re pretty great too

@brennadine

Morning sickness, but instead of being pregnant you just find mornings repulsive.

@brennadine

[Cat outside bathroom door]
LET ME IN
LET ME IN
LET ME IN
I’M DYIIIIING
Oh
Hi there
Thanks for letting me-
I’m bored
I want out
LET ME OUT

@brennadine

It’s my favorite time of year, the time when everyone puts their clothes back on and goes inside.

@brennadine

Thought it would be romantic to recreate the 12 Days of Christmas, but having 23 game birds indoors is actually a hellish nightmare.

@brennadine

Pavlov’s bell, but it’s me reading an email that I think says winebar when it’s actually webinar.

@brennadine

Got Christmas card glitter all over me and now I can’t stop stripping.

@brennadine

Hang on guys. My boyfriend told me not to be anxious, so I expect to feel better any moment.

@brennadine

How to Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin
Step 1: Stop wearing other people’s skin