@darksidedeb

I hate it when someone says “here’s the thing…” and then doesn’t give me a thing.

@darksidedeb

Grew up in a neighborhood so tough, all the kids put onions in their ‘no tears’ shampoo.

@darksidedeb

Of course I believe in science, like how jelly grows inside donuts.

@darksidedeb

Sharks have to keep moving so their creditors can’t find them.

@darksidedeb

If eating at night is bad for you, they shouldn’t have put a light in the sky.

@darksidedeb

It’s a painting of dogs playing poker because cats would’ve just knocked all the cards off the table.