This one never gets the credit it deserves
Can someone help I just stepped into an elevator with Slayer and they won’t stop staring
I empty the recycling bin on my computer like someone’s actually gonna come along and say “ew gross this bin needs emptied”
my proudest tweet
If God hates gays so much, why didn’t he put it in the ten commandments? Instead he’s more pissed that you’re jealous of your friend’s PS4
The problem with having a large imagination is that you can imagine your friends naked. Now you’re doing it too.
All the guys in working out photos look like they’re straining or in pain, but there’s lots of pictures of me with cake and I look happy.
Do furries go to doctors or vets?