Does it…does it take 3 days
*in the car*
7yo: I can count to 100,000
5yo: oh yeah, then do it
me: no
No one:
My kid at 6am: if we plant a sausage maybe we can grow a sausage tree
School email said if we shop at a certain store a potion will be donated, and that sounds way more exciting than money
me: wow you sure are playing hard to get
after-school appointment at my kid’s dentist: *blushes* oh you
My kid made up a song that goes “I love you and would do anything for you except clean” like some kind of 7yo Meat Loaf
I just want the confidence of a youtuber who suddenly thinks they can sing
I was wondering why so many houses on zillow had the same ugly carpeting. Reader, I clicked on the same house multiple times.
My kids made a mixture of snow, corn chex, chocolate chips, and apple slices on the kitchen floor so now I need a new house
Why does this look like one of the ingredients is painkillers
Sorry we’re late, my kid thought he couldn’t go to school with hiccups
Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting
What wine pairs best with finding out my in-laws are staying a day longer than I thought
kids: *having a rough day*
air-conditioning: *broken*
me: *sweaty and irritated*
underwire bra: would be a shame if something were to suddenly…snap
The 6yo told my husband to be a dear, which seemed weirdly old-fashioned until I realized it was deer and he wanted to attack him with a toy cheetah