We got two inches of snow last night and now I can’t find my Smart Car.
*checks pockets for phone 53 times before jumping in pool*
*skinny dips to be on the safe side*
Doggy day care is like a regular day care except you have to enter from the rear.
Being with you is like listening to golf on the radio.
Don’t get it. Heard the phrase “keep your friends clothes & keep your enemies clothes, sir”. Now I have a bunch of naked people angry at me.