My dog goes by 25 nicknames and only uses her official name when she’s being formal at the veterinarians office.
I’m at that age where my kids are old enough for me to let them know that the dog is my favorite child.
If a movie was named “Home Alone” in 2020, it would be a fantasy film.
I hate when my phone rings and I have to interrupt what I was looking at online and stare at it until it stops.
I walked in on my 13 year old boy watching YouTube videos and I was mortified…
What kind of psychopath watches Bob Ross at 13?
All of these people here talking about how they love with their whole heart…
I’m just happy I didn’t bite anyone today.
Not now, I’m binge watching the weather channel.
Think you had a bad childhood?
Wait until you see what adulthood has to offer.
The 3 second rule: the time between when you tell me your name and when I introduce myself and wonder what you said your name was.
Started to go to the gym this morning, couldn’t find my membership card…
A new one was $10
A donut & coffee were $3
Guess who saved $7?