Just put bacon grease in my wax warmer and now Matha Stewart is calling me for tips
Any beach is a nude beach if you drink enough alcohol
Friday the 13th is my favorite movie about killing anyone having more sex than me
The chick at this circus just swallowed a sword and I saw a guy elbow his woman like “see?…”
Why does it have to rain men? Why can’t it rain something useful like Doritos?
Him: What’s your sign?
Me: Dollar