@huntigula: if you love something, set it free. If it immediately bites your throat and drags you up a tree, you love a leopard and should try to escape
@huntigula: *finds all 7 dragonballs
*dragon appears* "WHAT IS YOUR WIS...OH GODDAMMIT CHAD, FOR THE LAST TIME I CANNOT MAKE PEOPLE RESPECT NICKELBACK"
@huntigula: *suddenly pulls away from kissing* why aren't there any female Transformers?!?
@huntigula: Good Cop: If you tell us where the money is we can help you.
Bag Cop: *majestically floats around the interrogation room on AC currents*
@huntigula: *suddenly pulls away from kissing* BUT WHERE DOES THE STORK GET THE BABY FROM?!?
@huntigula: *Hamburglar returns home with bag of hamburgers*
*his wife, holding a crying baby, slaps the bag out of his hands*
"WE NEED MONEY, DAMMIT!"
@huntigula: Fun bible fact: No records exist of Jesus' life from age 12 to 30 because he was backpacking across Europe with his pet Pterodactyl
@huntigula: Pacman: I feel like a woman trapped in a man's body! I want the procedure, doc.
Dr.: Very well. Just relax..
*puts bow on Pacman's head