Kids insults are great. My youngest told my oldest “If your clothes were any tighter, you’d look like a wiener dog”
My sister in law got my daughter a doll that sings and blows bubbles and I can’t wait for revenge. I mean my niece’s birthday.
My son and daughter were just arguing, and as she was walking away he yelled at her “I HOPE BOTH SIDES OF YOUR PILLOW ARE WARM TONIGHT!”
Jacob Marley: You will be haunted, by three spirits
Me: Ok, like that’s any worse than being haunted by the stupid thing I said in science class back in 2000.
Gave myself a steam facial* today
*opened a bag of freshly popped popcorn too close to my face
Thoughts and prayers for my 17 year old. Nothing’s wrong with her. She’s just mad that she has to put gas in her own car on a cold day.