just ate soup so fast my Fitbit thought i was running
I GOT INTO HARVARD!! 馃槏馃コ馃コ馃コ they left a first-floor window unlocked and i鈥檓 just walking around in here!
me: i want to save this document
computer: great, just click save
me: ok i want to save it as something else
computer: easy, save as
me: amazing! i鈥檓 gonna save it as a pdf
computer: print
me: dating sucks, lot of weirdos out there
me on dates: hey i had three beers before you got here do you believe in ghosts
women are like cars. sometimes there鈥檚 a squirrel living in there