The main thing I miss about family dinners is masterfully conveying my silent rage via angry salt and pepper shaking.
*sells “no soliciting” signs door to door
I still remember when “information is power” could be said with a straight face. Thank goodness the internet put that myth to rest.
I don’t know who needs to hear this but women don’t really wear flowery see-through dresses to ride horses in real life.
There is no wrong response when someone tells you they have named their pet after you.
Must suck to see your ex getting married. I wouldn’t know, all mine have died in mysterious fiery car crashes.
Must suck to see your ex getting married. I wouldn’t know, all mine have died in mysterious, firey car crashes.