Please be gentle with me I used to be a baby
Preparing myself for a post apocalyptic wasteland by learning how to sleep without the TV on
I’m vegan now but I’m still gonna eat eight spiders a year on cheat days
Seems kinda suspicious
Having a crush is weird bc one minute you’re a normal person and then out of nowhere you’re like damn I wanna bake that boy a pie
Stop tweeting about what real women are and are not. You’re going to blow my secret that I’m a lizard creature zipped into a woman suit