yes yes a thousand times yes!
CTRL + C and CTRL + V another window
all my demons came for free. these must be organic.
When my kids wanted candy conversation hearts, my husband explained that they’re seasonal, and my 7yo said, “well the government could force stores to sell them.”
Your move, government.
if we’re gonna be politically correct, the male counterpart to a mermaid is a merbutler
as i search desperately for my floor, panic rises in lieu of the elevator
my tamagotchi skills didn’t translate into parenting skills as seamlessly as i had hoped
the perfect lunchbox d̶o̶e̶s̶n̶’̶t̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶
*showing my kids bobsledding clips*
My 5yo: *matter of factly* They should all be screaming.
Telling my kids this is why dinosaurs went extinct
“i am a sweet baby”
therapy dog: tell me your problems, sugar
my husband had a friend over for drinks last night and i woke up to this and what the hell happened?????
that time Mario got bit by a radioactive koala
My 7yo was taking pics of her sister, and I said, “oh isn’t she pretty” but 7 responded, “no she’s a suspect.”