Two hundred dollars for a women’s blazer?? Am I paying it to do the work for me??
Boss: Are you drinking at your desk?
Me: Yes, because it’s too hot outside.
The first 8-10 hours after I wake up are the roughest.
[watching a movie where kids’ teacher is hitting on the single mom]
Me: What if a man liked me—what would you think?
10: I don’t know. That’s never happened before.
If you leave me a voicemail that just says “call me back, I have a question” I am coming to burn your house down.