If listening to a 30 minute explanation of a 5 minute YouTube clip sounds fun, parenting may be right for you.
Are sharks attracted to or repelled by pickles? I need to pack my beach cooler just right.
*Sees feelings chasing me down.
*Builds wall of McDonald’s fries.
*Crisis averted.
I ate vegetables and now I’m hungrier than before. Donuts don’t betray me like this.
Seduction is an art and some of you are still making stick figures in finger paint
Spring allergies- because my body likes to panic about plant sex
I was worried about being overdressed for a Walmart run, but I spilled my dinner on my shirt, so I’m good now.
I’m walking more to lose weight in order to help my knees feel better. Walking more is making my knees sore.
The moral of the story?
Don’t have knees.
The most terrifying part of swimming in the ocean isn’t the sharks, it’s leaving your phone on the beach.