My 7 year old asked me why my brother’s family “only eats 3 meals a day” and that should tell you everything you need to know about my grocery bill.
Headed to the local Memorial Day parade so the boys can get a bunch of candy I’ll be throwing away in 6 months.
Don’t send me back to bed if you don’t want me sneaking out again.
~My 8 year old, trying out a new tactic
We’re just started on a 6 hour drive and the boys simultaneously jinxed each other. They won’t talk until I say their names and they’re silently mouthing things at each other.
I just won the traveling with kids lottery.
I was driving with my teenage niece and she turned on a band and said “they’re kinda underground, but I like them.”
Green Day, the band was Green Day.
Me: It’s time to take a bath.
6: Ugh, I took one a few days ago!
Me: Yeah, you gotta keep taking those.
6: For my whole life?
Me: Yes
6: What!? Uggggghhhhh
We’re playing Mario party and the boys keeps intentionally referring to Luigi as Louis and it’s making me irrationally angry.
My 5 year old was looking at the meerkats in the zoo amazed and I said “aren’t they so cute” and he was like “I want to cook the babies and make soup.”
Me: Why aren’t you in bed?
5: I need smooth jazz.
Me: Uh what?
5: I NEED YOU TO PLAY ME SMOOTH JAZZ!
5 grabbed the rest of my sandwich and said, “Don’t mind if I do!” and walked away.
I’d be mad if I wasn’t so impressed with his confidence.
Making friends was so much easier as a kid.
5: This is the smallest finger I have.
Other 5yo at the park: Well this is the smallest finger I have!
Both: (giggle)
“WHY ARE THEY STEALING OUR TRASH!?”
~ My kid, horrified that the garbage men are doing their job.
I don’t mean to brag, but I’m pretty sure based on the amount of stuffed animal surgery I’ve done, I’m a doctor now.
A guy asked my kiddos if they were on Santa’s naughty list or his good list. They both said good, but as soon as we got in the car, 4 was worried and asked “sooooo…how good do you have to be, to be on the good list?”
That seems sus.
7’s new favorite animal is the spider.
He tells me fact after fact about them, he’s made the background of his school iPad a spider, and he shows me pictures constantly.
I’ve been a pretty good mom, so I’m not sure what I did to deserve this.