Gift cards are another way of saying, don’t spend this on dope.
Your car took up two spaces, I tried to move it over with my key.
Saw a unicorn using a phone booth and all I can think is, who is she calling?
I hate when my camera rings, in the middle of a selfie.
What the world needs is a self help movie, cause lets face it, most of us won’t buy the book.
Why do girls keep giving me their fax numbers?
Apparently, I just ate 39 servings of Tic – Tacs.