*Opens freezer*
Yo ice! Whatchu upto?
“Just chillin.”
Haha!
“HAHA!”
Hehe.
“Drunk again huh?”
Yeah.
Most computer problems stem from the lack of a fatherboard.
No? Ok, I’ll show myself out.
I caught a genie! He keeps saying “I’m not a genie. Let me go!” Whatever, Ahmed. You can go when I get my magic carpet. I know my rights.
At this point the angel on my shoulder just mutters “You’ll regret it,” then slowly sips whiskey.
Public restrooms are weird. The guy in the stall next to me has four feet and is wearing heels on one pair.