The amount of alcohol I would need to sleep with you would actually kill me.
That moment the school calls because 15 was caught drinking at school and it’s still the same principal that had to call your parents.
Fastest way to occupy bored kids is to announce we are going to clean
Voila
Suddenly they all remember plans they’ve forgotten
Ah quiet
None of my boyfriends even know they’re dating me.
I lifted my hands up in the air and waved them like I just didn’t care…..
Ceiling fan: 6
Me: 0