I’m done – Now even the damn ouija board is asking me who I’m voting for in the election
Real life dad college courses
Garage law
Power nap philosophy
Nosy neighbor studies
Barbecue physics
Zipper theory of merging traffic
Thermostat dynamics
As a parent when you hear a bang
you wait
There’s an eerie silence that
your kid is either fine
or filling their lungs with a wail the volume of an air raid siren
It’s an scientific fact that the smoke detector battery will only die at 0230
Generally when you hear the phrase “hold my beer and watch this”
Just dial 911
Never do anything you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics