-I’ve got a phobia of coincidences.
-Me too!
*faints*
*faints*
I saw a statue of Cinderella today. I didn’t like it, but I found the plinth charming.
Me: *returns from bakery with a bap, bagel, bun & cob*
Wife: What are these?
Me: The synonym rolls you asked for.
Wife: CINNAMON.
I had a crazy dream that I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram. I was, like, 0mg!
I passed my genetic engineering exam with flying koalas.
My wife and I can’t agree on appropriate gardening attire. But she’s digging in her heels.
I just cross-bred a crocodile and a homing pigeon. I expect that’ll come back to bite me.