the world is kind of a disaster anyways let’s do a Jurassic park, dinosaurs deserve another go
If the name of a show is just some guy’s name you know its about a killer.
E.g. Dexter, Barry, Arthur
so loyal to apple products that the only birth control I use is the iUD
whoever designed giraffes was extremely high
they should hide prizes in more boxes than just cereal, I’d love to reach into my laundry detergent and find a colour changing spoon
not sure why everyone acts like it’s so hard to make plans with your friends as an adult because my friend and I just planned our hangout tomorrow in 5 minutes and it only took us 3 months to find a day that works
I have very conflicting feelings about getting murdered because on one hand I’d be dead but on the other hand I’d be making sure female podcasters had content and I love women supporting women
anytime I meet someone who doesn’t like dogs I assume their backstory is that they were cut from their high school basketball team because airbud took their spot
When you’re Godzilla every city is a walkable city
Apparently I’m only fluent in English until it comes time to leave a voicemail
as someone who lives on earth rising sea levels are alarming. But as someone who has always wanted to be a mermaid? I’m intrigued
it’s not really fair to ask kids what they want to be when they grow up because as a kid I had no idea being a podcast cohost who does no research and just gasps or laughs was an option
if I wasn’t supposed to grow up to want a sugar daddy why did we base an entire holiday around a much older man bringing me presents for being a good girl
I don’t trust scrapbookers because I feel it’s a slippery slope to ransom letters
I should be able to preheat my bed like an oven